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in critical condition, but..

stable. ive started eating again. soothin wounds with chocolate ice cream. ive been slammed at work. Supposed to go swim tonight---swim it all out. if i have enough energy from the few calories ive munched. my analyst is leaving at 4pm today and im counting the seconds. this is my break. to vent. to share how odd it is to feel as if one's core is a knarled oak tree being pulled apart by opposing bulls.

From some lingering shit about a boy that I suppose I wouldnt even know anymore. this is what everyone points out. and i have to acknowledge the wisdom. i am trying. i have a wedding to go to tomorrow. i definately will be crying at this one.