ok, so this isnt gross or bad..just strange. I was on the R train heading downtown to class after work. Across from me was this dirty blonde 20 something in mismatched modest long skirt, shirt and a jacket hung over her shoulders, plugged into an Ipod. She was holding a box of raspberries and voraciously wolfing them down. Now this is strange to me 'cause 1: most snacking on the street and in the subway is done out of chip bags or chicken buckets or is pizza balanced on a paper plate. 2: not only it is fruit, but berries. Raspberries which go for 4.99 around here. 3. If yur that hungry, spend 4.99 on something more filling! (not that raspberries arnt delightful. 4. she didnt take her eyes off the raspberries for the whole 2 minutes she spend shoveling 1 after the other into her mouth.
ok, maybe this doesnt seem random to anyone else, but it did to me. I watched her look very perplexed at almost every stop, which i could only relate to cause when Im listening my my Ipod, i get confused too. really, it's a hazard. im not kidding!
So, I had plans for a dinner and MOMA date with Dave tonight. My live ladybugs for the garden arrived in the mail today. I told Dave last night that I'd have them with me and he said he was excited let them loose with me. so, this morning, I thought, wow, the MOMA closes at 8pm anyway. How about a quick snack, a view of the Richard Serra stuff, and then head back home to play with bugs and I'd make him a nice dinner. We've barely spoken this week because he's been busy with work stuff. I told him that when he moves to New Haven in 1 year for his fellowship, we better talk more than we did this past week. He got all huffy with me about getting work done so that we could see each other without having to do things on the weekends. Fair enough. I told him I understood that he was busy, but I also needed to communicate that 3 minutes a day on the phone during the weekdays does not make me feel loved and satisfied.
Forward to today. I have me some bugs on my desk (yay!). I get a call at 11am. Our friend Cherie called him and asked if she should tag along tonight. She also invited us to a cocktail party on the upper east side. I told Dave that I had come up with a new plan, but if Cherie was hangin with us that we couldnt do it. I told him that we I would eat here at the office (fridge full of food goin to waste, yo) and then meet up with them at the MOMA. Then I'd take off to go home and play with buggies. He got all annoyed with me and asked why I wouldnt come out to dinner and cocktails. and I told him cause I had to release the bugs. I also said that if the party was in the LES or EV, I'd come back into the city for drinks, but it's too far away to get back home again at a decent hour. I have that lifeguarding class at 8am tomorrow, so I cant be out till all hours. So then he starts in that he havent talked all week and this weekend was botched because he starts night call on Sunday night. and I had told him that I needed to study Japanese on Saturday night. I totally flubbed here and was like, well, after lifeguarding class, we can hang out and uh, i guess ill study after you go.
Truthfully, I need to start studying right after i get home. Im super behind. If he wanted to see me, free of obligations, tonight was the night, and I was prepared to make it romantic and interesting. It wasnt me who said ok to Cherie tagging along. Im fine with it, but it wasnt me who decided to not have our night together alone. and yeah, i need to study tomorrow night. so boo hoo.
on the other hand, its getting really hard to do the distance thing. and ive got at 2 1/2 years more of it before we could possibly live any closer. I Really hate it and at the same time, I wonder if i will feel smothered. 3 years of the past 3.3 have been at a distance. That's a long time. and almost 6 in total until we can be together (aka, i can just drop by on a weekday and hang out or stay over, or have dinner in the city, or SEE him at all) ??? Painful.
And then my boss decided to blow off his lunch and eat my portion of the office lunch that we all waited 2 hours to deliver. Im pissed.