Nekomimi Lisa (lisagoddess) wrote,
Nekomimi Lisa

i dont know what to do with myself. my transcript looks terrible (considering id leave to go to a new media conference during finals week and all..). im close to broke (although that will change when i start paying 250$ of rent instead of 1500$!), my job is getting tedious (although it is VERY steady, a security that many people dont have.)
in many ways, im ok. in fact, i am doing damn well, but im not satisfied. i feel im missing something. i am not excited and stimulated. (although my boy did run into the oregon dance theatre and they did give us free tickets for tomorrow night's ballet!)
ok, perhaps there is nothing to complain about at all except there can be no moving of any sort (never mind ideas of seattle...even if i were to stay in NYC...and of any sort does not mean into james's cramped means out of James's cramped studio) in my mind, moving is adventure. yes, moving the stuff sucks, but its change, and i find that its hard for me to live without it.
Bush scares me. This economy scares me. The middle east scares me. Sometimes I wish there was a way to go live in the hills for 10 years and then return after the disaster.
im scared today. i dont know why. reading the jobs forum on craigslist didnt help. james is quitting his job in 2 weeks. I will be supporting us until he finds a new one.

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