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such an asshole!

Letter to Paul (a new aquaintence) from Me this morning...referencing getting stood up last week.

BTW: Im not sure if you forgot, or what, but you completely stood me up last Wed. We chatted on Tuesday, remember..and you said you were busy on Thursday. So I said..what about tomorrow. you said sure and you get home around 7, and would call when you got in. So here I am waiting for your phone call, starving my ass off until 9pm, and you never called. and never bothered to email or anything to apologize. you can imagine i had decided that that was an obvious sign to bugger off. didnt think you were like that. im sorta hurt, you know?

Letter from Paul to Me this afternoon:

Apologize for wednesday, but unfortunately I don't have the kind of mentality that you about making definite plans. If there was a reason I didn't call you on Wednesday, it was because I had other commitments. Its the reason I never make definite plans with someone until the day of. Even then I have to bail sometimes. My life revolves around my work right now, and unlike you I don't have the power nor the ability to dictate my freetime. I didn't mean to hurt you, but I think its childish for you to say that. Hopefully you'll understand where I'm coming from, otherwise I guess this is probably a goodbye.

Letter back to Paul from Me:

Hi Paul:

This definately is goodbye. Your self-centeredness and lack of responsibility towards a person's time is competely intolerable. It's not about definate plans; if you are late or can't make an obligation, it's polite to contact the person and let them know you can't make it. Reason: my life doesn't revolve around yours. I'd have been happy enough to call someone else. I'm sorry you feel it's childish for a person to express the feelings of being hurt by another's lack of respect. I didn't stay up all night crying my eyes out. Not to worry. But it's not the best feeling in the world to be competely forgotten.

Best of luck to you. Enjoy that job of yours.



( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 5th, 2003 10:20 am (UTC)
and luckily you don't have the kind of mentality to take shit from somebody.
It is called courtesy and sadly more and more people lack it.

Didn't you work with or for an Asian company? Do you have any tips on mentality and cultural difference for me? I've taken over as CSR for Asia and the person before me did some damage by insulting the colleagues over there and I'd like to avoid that. Any tip is highly appreciated.
Aug. 5th, 2003 01:10 pm (UTC)
Hmm...how not to insult. Well, in general, you probably are starting fresh. Be really polite. If you need information, or something done, be extra sugar nice like:

Dear so and so:

Thank you so much for all your help with such and such. Sorry to create more work for you, but at your earliest convenience, please do such and such. Again, your help is really appreicated!

Something like that. Uhm. They like it when you ask questions about the culture. Uhm...people are people. Just be generally polite and professional. If you need to be prepared for a meeting, be prepared. And the like. But always be polite. Always.

Aug. 5th, 2003 10:26 am (UTC)
he had it coming, he's the childish person for thinking so narrow like.

Aug. 5th, 2003 10:57 am (UTC)
Touche' What a self absorbed asshole.
Aug. 5th, 2003 01:29 pm (UTC)
i'm so sick of calling people on their lateness or irresponsibility and then to have them come back and tell me i'm nagging or, in your case, childish. is it that wrong to want people to value your company? ugh.
Aug. 5th, 2003 05:19 pm (UTC)
You're absolutely right, it's about respect for you as a person, and the fact that you made time for him, and he chose not to be there.

His loss, not yours.
Aug. 5th, 2003 06:26 pm (UTC)
Wow! The audacity of some people.

No wonder I'm such a misanthrope.
Aug. 5th, 2003 09:01 pm (UTC)
I take it this guy doesn't know how to behave because he doesn't have a lot of friends. Only he can break out of that viscous cycle.
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )